Friday, February 7, 2014

Harry Potter stunt double paralyzed on set

A few years ago the "last" Harry Potter book was released concurrently with the movie. Commercials bragged that you could watch "The thrilling climax" on the big screen. Well, it turns out the movies are going to keep going after the books have finished, and the filming of the latest installment of witch boy Harry Potter's ongoing attack on Christ has crippled his stunt double.

Daniel Radcliffe’s stunt double has suffered serious spinal injuries on the set of the latest Harry Potter film.

David Holmes was rehearsing a flying scene involving an explosion when he plummeted to the ground.

He remained conscious but told crew members: ‘I can’t feel my legs.’ He was taken to hospital as fears grew that he had suffered a paralysing back injury.
This is, of course, just the beginning of God's judgment on this satanic enterprise. After years of plodding along, stretching out a tired old premise, the hand of judgment is coming down upon the people responsible for this abomination, this insult to Christ. This initial injury is just a warning, and I hope it leads David Holmes to reject the evils of his past and embrace Christ.

The people responsible for "Harry Potter" are in far more trouble than they think. They've insulted God, compounding that insult and leading children to reject Christ in favor of witchcraft and the fantasies of witchcraft. God's judgment will be harsh for those who do not repent.

I know there are people who have wanted to take their own action, o try and carry out God's judgment as human agents of divine wrath. I urge anyone with such motives to stay your hand. God has shown he's perfectly capable of dealing with these people. "Judgment is mine" says the Lord. It is our responsibility to teach, to minister, to educate and spread God's word, not to carry out judgment with our own hands.

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

Didn’t Hollywood learn anything from the Poltergeist and Omen curses? Our good lord doesn’t like competition on film. They can make as many versions of the bible as they want, but Satan can’t get any.

Anonymous said...

A closing comment like “you had it coming, you crippled warlock” would have been a nice touch.

Barry said...

Alexander Poe Cornswalled, you've done it again. First off, you're factually wrong about the final movie's release coinciding with the release of the final book.

Secondly, if you are willing to ascribe to your god one injury that occurred in the production of an extended franchise of movies, then your god's name is "probability".

In your scenario, god exercises his judgment against a stuntman while JK Rowling and Daniel Radcliffe - arguably the two people most symbolic of Harry Potter - are leading wonderful lives.

Do you ever think before blogging?

Anonymous said...

What a wonderful, slow-witted god you serve. The books and movies came out, what, 8 or 9 years ago? And it's taken this long for god to execute his wrath on what - an insignificant stunt double who was injured at best?

Woo hoo.

dave said...

With all of the horrible movies that have come out since the 90s alone, this is the one that is pissing off God. Personally, I would think that He would have lost it when they released "It's Pat" (based on the Saturday Night Live character).

Anonymous said...

Mr. Alexander Cornswalled. WHY ARE YOU SO HARSH?!!!! I'm a Christian too and I like the Harry Potter movies. A couple of friends of mine are actors of these films. I can't say who they are so don't ask. And Anonymous why did you call Dan's stunt double who got hurt a insignificant stunt double. I know this guy. He IS NOT insignificant!! NO stunt double of ANY movie is insignificant.

Anonymous said...

He's "insignificant" in the overall plot of god overthrowing Harry Potter in Cornswalled's eyes. I am sorry he was hurt, but Corny was making it sound like "Ha! See? God's getting his revenge on a major player!"

Steven said...

Yes Sandy, your god is wreaking his vengeance on the author of childrens fiction and apparent promoter of satanic practices by allowing her financial success yet causing the STUNT DOUBLE of the films star (also exceedingly wealthy and leading a comfortable life) to fall and be seriously hurt.

Beware his wrath mortal for it is righteous and guided!

Also, your hotline to god is somewhat on the fritz as it seems his judgement started to come into effect around nine months ago when he bade one of his servants (in this case 21 year old psychotic Karl Bishop) to stab bit part actor (Rob Knox, 18) to death for having gained a role in a H.P. movie.

Heed my word sinners! Repent now, for the lord is mighty and shall strike down mostly out of work actors who have no relation to you as retribution!

Your ability to draw a conclusion from available fact, is such that I don't understand how is you've not yet been knocked down while crossing the street.

Allahu Akbar said...

"The series also originated much tie-in merchandise, making the Harry Potter brand worth £7 billion (US$15 billion)."

THIS IS THE WRATH OF GOD! REPENT, OR THOU SHALT MAKE BILLIONS OF DOLLARS! REPENT! REPENT!

Anonymous said...

I have a question for Alexander. Do you have children? If not, do you ever plan on having any? If so, and you HONESTLY believe everything you just said, then I would advise you not to let your children watch ANY Disney movies, because they ALL incluse MAGIC of some sort. And dont take them to Disneyworld to the MAGIC kingdom! And dont say "thats different" because its not! MAGIC IS MAGIC! Its ALL evil, right! HAHAHAHA!! Even innocent Cinderella had to have magic just to go to the ball!

Alexander Cornswalled said...

Allahu Akbar,

Rowling's Mother died from MS, and Rowling herself is already showing, but trying to hide, symptoms.

Yes,. she's wealthy, but God has stuck her body and sent her on a long slow death march with a terrible and incurable disease. Money means nothing when you spend all your time in a wheelchair.

Anonymous said...

Yes, clearly your beloved lord and savior is starting by punishing stuntmen working on movies.

God works in mysterious ways, because god rides the short bus.

OLIVIA ROSE. said...

It amuses me greatly that you take the time out of your obviously much-devoted life to write about the 'satanic enterprise' that is Harry Potter.
I find you to be quite an evil person, as you are clearly relishing the fact someone has aquired an injury that will affect the rest of their life. Would God really be pleased if he knew you were doing such a satanic thing as relishing the pain of others? Surely you are supposed to "Love Thy Neighbour"? If you're not careful you'll end up in the sin bin with the rest of us who sinned as far as to enjoy a few books and films.
Harry Potter is a series of books that are quite frankly, so fantastic that enough people were inspired by it to take time to also make it a series of films. I myself am a huge fan. You say that it is 'leading children to reject Christ in favor of witchcraft and the fantasies of witchcraft.'
Did it ever occur to you this may be because Harry Potter's got something the Bible doesn't? I certainly had far more enjoyment reading the series than I ever did reading the Bible at school. Harry Potter is a fantasy book and provides a form of escapism for many people.
Another point, maybe people prefer the Harry Potter series because JK Rowling managed to tie up the loose ends of her book, which is unreminiscent of the gaping holes in the Bible.
I urge you to find better things to do with your time, perhaps continue "to teach, to minister, to educate and spread God's word" so I don't have to come across such disgusting rubbish during my day.
As an aspiring author myself, it would be my dream to create a passion for millions around the world, whilst doing something I loved and providing a living for my family that i perhaps could not have done beforehand. If i manage to create anywhere near such a fantastic, genius and inspiring "insult to Christ" I'll drop you my number and we'll have a nice little chat about how i'm going to straight to hell and how much you'll enjoy it.

In the meantime, grow up.

Anonymous said...

What a load of crap. I came across this blog, and could not help but share it to my colleagues, because this is complete and utter nonsense.

You are probably the worst Christian there can be, judging others. Love thy neighbour and all of that, bearing false witness against your neighbour. In fact, just being plain rude about the situation. Many crew members are devoted Christians. They don't make these films to anger god! They do it for entertainment!

Your heart is cold.

Hell has a seat with your name on it.

-G